There are some things people don’t tell you when you go through a separation/ divorce.

While these may be obvious things, they are things you simply don’t think about until you are in the moments.

Sleepless Nights/ Broken Sleep.

There are nights where I have broken sleep or sleep maybe four hours total.

My son has been having nightmares and my youngest daughter sometimes just wants someone to cuddle with at 2:00am.

Sometimes both wake up at the same time and it’s obviously just me to take care of them.

I know this stage is short lived as my oldest started sleeping better once she turned three. The twins will be three in November, so I am trying to see the light at the end of the tunnel.

Of course, I am thankful to have peace at night; not having a toxic argument before bed [almost[ every night is liberating.

No [PM] breaks.

There’s no one that comes home to you at the end of the night to give you a “break.” In the past, I would run to the supermarket at 9:00pm because I just needed to make a grocery run kid free.

I recently signed up for Walmart’s grocery delivery service and that has helped me so much to feel more independent in “that aspect.”

Because I have so little “free” time to myself, I rather not fill it with a grocery run.

Mom Guilt Amplifies.

This I struggle with only my oldest.

She remembers a time where mom and dad lived together. She remembers waking up in the middle of the night and seeing us both hover over her bed.

Trying to explain it to a five year old is harder then it seems. She understands that we don’t live together but not sure as to why. I know as time goes on, she will understand more and it will just become her “new normal.“

But this just makes me feel guilty.

I can’t provide her with her father’s comfort at midnight. But I reassure her that dad loves her and will see her in the morning to drop her off at school.

As they say [and I keep saying], time heals all. ❤